As I look up from where I sit in on my sofa I see the memorial cards sent by friends and family members. They’ve been up there for quite some time now, so much so the cobwebs are starting to form. I suppose it is just in time for the Halloween season, if that’s your thing. I told myself I’d leave them up until her ashes were spread out on the gulf coast. It hasn’t happened yet. The only real available weekend was the one when we had a hurricane. She at least would have been able to travel. The fact she wants to be spread out on the water is strange to me, she never liked the water. She was scared of it. I have to laugh about that…I bet she never really thought about it. If she used that same process maybe she wouldn’t have carried that fear all of her life. Hmmm. My sister is coming down, my niece is non available right now and my kids schedules are like concrete. A time when we can ceremonially put her ashes to the wind and our spirits at rest is a good guess. If I wasn’t so icked out on having her possibly “blow up in my face” I’d do it myself. I rather think she’d prefer the way Shirley McClaine and Jack Nicolson sent Rosie the maid sailing down the beach. Only in the movies.
I need to dust the top of my bookcase eventually and free up the bottom shelf of my mom…I want her to finally “spread her wings and fly” She needs that. I need it for her too. I want her free as the wind and happy for all eternity. She deserves that….
I love you mom…….